He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
