So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
We had sex on a dog bed..
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
