lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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