He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
