how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
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