i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
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