What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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