I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
