I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Still dying that you shit outside
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
