He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I can't turn off my feet"
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
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