Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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