Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
