The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize
