with your own penis?
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Randomize
