Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I smell like Dick and happiness
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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