the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
