just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize
