Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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