It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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