What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize