Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
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