I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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