i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Randomize
