i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
we should paint friendship bongs
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize