if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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