i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Randomize
