he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
she pinky promised me she was 18
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
