y did u give ur computer a hand job?
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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