So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
