I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize
