I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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