Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
