She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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