u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Randomize
