It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
