Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
