Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
