There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
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