I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize