it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
