Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Randomize
