On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
don't judge my taste in strippers
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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