i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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