New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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