I must be too annoying 4 u.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Randomize
