ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
