it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
