that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
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