I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
