Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Randomize
